A while back, I wrote about the Gaijin bubble ... a mysterious concept in Japan where on subways/buses, if the Japanese realize you're a foreigner .. they will move away;
leaving gaps in the seats adjacent to you.
No one really knows why this is the case ... we gaijin speculate that this most likely is due to the local Japanese folks fearing that you will suddenly start speaking to them in English ... to which they will not know how to respond... which then causes awkwardness.
A few days ago, I was on the Yamanote Line. This line is the "ring line" around Tokyo and is frequently touted as the busiest train system in the world.
(During rush hours, they actually have train pushers that will push people in to trains when they are already insanely packed in order to allow the doors to close.)
When I was on the train, it was in the evening. This meant while it was a bit crowded, it was not a "Sardine-can" like during rush hours.
I entered the car and then was able to get a seat. At this point there were people on both sides of me.
A few minutes later, I took a call in English. It was my co-worker Ken, the IT guy.
"Hello. Yeah... Yeah I sent it. " the phone cut out for a few seconds. "HELLO? YEAH I SAID I SENT IT, KEN DON'T WORRY ABOUT IT."
Due to the poor reception which I had for a few seconds, I found myself shouting a bit. As the call ended, a couple people to my left had gotten up and moved to the other side of the train.
I laughed to myself ... so the bubble starts.
A few moments later, I got a perfect setup... a co-worker from Norway called ... I saw the number on the caller ID (+47 xxx.xx.xxxx).
Hmmm, I thought to myself. They are already freaked out, I may as well give them a show...
I took the call and shouted my responses. I also made sure to REALLY make the Norwegian vowel sounds especially long.
"HALLO? HEISAN!! HVORDAN GÅR DET? JAAAAA, DET KAN VI GJØØØØØØRE. MEN DET SKAL TA LITT TID FORDI JEG IKKE SKAL KOMME TILBAAAAAKE TIL NESTE MÅNED ... JA, JA, JA, GREIT! VI SNAKKES. HA DET BRA! HEI HEI!!!!"
At the end of that call -EVERYONE- around me had moved away... I basically had an empty seat section all to myself.
Nice! I need to try this next time during rush hour.
About 5 feet to my right, I saw a mother with a kid around 5 years old. The kid was clearly tired and wanted to sit down, but it was blatantly obvious to me that the mother was terrified.
She grabbed the kid and I could hear the mom muttering under her breath "だめ！だめ！彼は外国人です！ [No! No! that's a foreigner!]
Eventually the kid pulled away and came over. He then sat next to me. He stared at me for a few seconds, then pulled out his Nintendo Switch and started playing games.
The mom then moved closer so that she was standing just in front of her son. I guess she thought she needed to be close by in case we foreigners reverted back to our demon forms.
Well, this is already one of those days, I thought to myself. Let's see how much stranger we can make this...
I turned to the kid, he looked up at me.
"お母さんは外国人が好きじゃないですか [So your mom doesn't like foreigners？]" I asked the kid.
The mom looked at me shocked. It was obvious that she didn't think I could hear her, and probably even less obvious that I understood Japanese. Her face turned beet red in embarrassment.
Just when the mom thought it couldn't get any worse ... her kid gives her the "coup de grace"
"そうですね [yeah]" replied the kid. "ちょっとびっくりだった。そこし前に、彼女はあんたにデブと言ったので、彼女は俺にここで座って欲しくないと思いました. [I was surprised. I thought she didn't want me to sit here because earlier she said you were fat!]"
 |