Down and Out in Paradise: The Life of Anthony Bourdain

I will be honest .. it's been over 4 years, and Bourdain's death still bothers me. How could a guy that had EVERYTHING (and I mean EVERYTHING) just throw it all away? I was really f*cking angry with the guy for taking the easy way out when he had some many people that adored him ... AND especially when he had a daughter.

I recently read the new biography on his life:

Down and Out in Paradise: The Life of Anthony Bourdain

by Charles Leerhsen and it did provide me with some answers. Specifcally it's the first bio that provided details on Bourdain and his mindset in the last few months.... details that the movie Roadrunner only alluded to.

Make no mistake, the last few chapters are heartbreaking. They involve major back-stabbing among his crew (e.g. firing Zack Zamboni), prostitutes, growth hormone and viagra. In the end, if the bio is true, Bourdain ... for all his talents, was really messed up.

I'm not sure what the point of this post is supposed to be about, I guess it was somewhat cathartic after reading the bio, I felt less anger towards the guy, and more sorrow. No matter how much we put him on a pedastal ... in the end he was just "one of us."

Pretty much every one has seen his last instagram post about the Light Lunch. I can only imagine what his state of mind was when he took that picture.

Anthony, for what this is worth, where-ever you are now, I hope you found some peace ...